sweatydog loves cats.

...That is what this journal is full of. I don't want anyone to try and take too much from it sometimes. I work everything out by writing and thinking. And art of course. I've been told before that I need to get out of my head. But thats where everything is going on. I mean I know the world is happening around me but being in my head is the only way I can make decisions about it. Here is where I put it down.
To recap on recent goings ons.

I still heart Mhazz.


That is all that seems important right now.

I'm doing something,
I'm going somewhere.

I'm just not sure quite how its happening yet.

Quite quite.

LOve me. Love me. Say that you love me.

I need your friendly face,
I need a familiar place,
I need to create,
I need to be alright,
Tell me I'm alright,

Tell me I can still be alright.

this is what I do.

I decided to make a youtube playlist of the music I've been listening to lately.

That way its easy to find as well.

http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=9CDA00338B8EA4C2

Track list:

01. Attention- The Raconteurs
02. Why I shouldn't have let you in- Tom Milsom
03. Smile- Lily Allen
04. Daylight- Matt and Kim
05. From the ritz to the rubble- Arctic monkeys
06. Love is dead- Kerli
07. Blake says- Amanda Palmer
08. Golden Days- Drake Bell
09. Little Cream Soda- The White Stripes
10. Loose Lips- Kimya Dawson
11. Yea Yeah- Matt and Kim
12. The Fear- Lily Allen
13. Broken- Robert Pattinson
14. You're pretty good lookin for a girl/ Hello operator-the white stripes
15. Astronaut- Amanda Palmer
16. I bet you look good on the dance floor- Arctic Monkeys
17. Fragile- Kerli
18. Old enough- The Raconteurs
19. Ldn- Lily Allen
20. The beat that my heart skipped- Dan le Sac vs Scroobius Pip
21. This Cocaine makes me feel like I'm on this song- System of a down
22. Top yourself- The Raconteurs
23. Leave before the lights come on- Artic Monkeys
24. Wrong side of the sun- Drake Bell
25. The Creationist- Kerli
26. Apple Blossom- The white stripes
27. Fluorescent Adolescent- Arctic monkeys
28. Radio/video- System of a down
29. Naive- Lily Allen Cover
30. Oasis- Amanda Palmer

So basically I've been listening to the Arctic Monkeys and Lily allen a lot.

Amanda Palmer, the white stripes/raconteurs and SOAD are really nothing new.

Yeah you know, that point where you're like "Damn I should really put some pants on"


Hey at least I ate this morning.

please watch this video before clicking the cut.



I would have posted J0ames but embedding is disabled. So Johnny's itis!

( Read more... )

"Glycerol ester of wood rosin, glyceryl abietate, or Ester gum is a food additive used as an emulsifier and stabiliser, to keep oils in suspension in water.[1] It is common in soft drinks, Full Throttle citrus energy drink, eyeliner pencils, Fierce Grape Gatorade and Gatorade "Tiger" Quiet Storm.[2] It has E number E445."

Sara Rue redheaded and curvy once again?!

That makes me entirely too happy.

I'm sorry but I cried when I saw she was skin and bone and blonde. She had been my idol as the only curvy young actress I could look up to when I was 10. On popular and in movies.

She was always my favorite and she changed what had made her unique and what I looked up to.

I love it. Though I miss her longer hair still.


Yayyaya.

God I'm shallow.

I'm brain dead at the moment. Can't buy me love is on TV and I wanted to share my favorite movies. Because I realized it was one of my favorites. So I searched for a meme to help me remember my other favorites.

Aladdin/Alice in wonderland
Batman Returns
Can't buy me love (1987)
Digimon The Movie
Edward Scissor hands
F
Grindhouse
Harry Potter
I
J
K
L
The Matrix
Nightmare before christmas
Orange County
P
Q
R
Shaun of the dead
Thirteen going on thirty
U
V
Willy Wonka and the chocolate factory/the Wizard of Oz
X
Y
Z

*Edit* I just wanted to see what my normal entries would look like if I didn't make each sentence its own paragraph.

A few inches of snow coat everything today. My balcony looks all fluffy. I'm hungry. I think I'm going to do some art today.I have magazines ready to be chopped and ramen waiting to be cooked. So this will be short. Sometimes I wonder if people are annoyed by the things I post. I know a few of you read this on occasion. Then I remembered that the reason I got this account in the first place is to keep track of myself. To let my friends know whats going on in my life and my mind since I moved. So I'll keep posting what I want and not worry about that.I really need to post some writing. I haven't done that in a while. Mostly because I usually just post it to deviant art right away. I don't even use word programs any more. I know I should really save some of that stuff to my computer. *shrug*

Video that made me smile today:



Oh John Green how I want to be the female form of you. And not in a creepy way at all. Only in the "I admire your mind and the things you've done and where you're at in your life and wish I could accomplish a similar life for myself" sort of way. Just switch the puppy to kitties, bunnies, or an alpaca and we're good.

I hate being so lonely.

I really wish I had someone who would drop everything to be with me.

I wanted to cry myself to sleep last night... then my tears dripped into my ears and I remembered I hated it. Then I had bad dreams about work and my mom and I had a son named "Icarus Jamie Sullivan Smith"

I called him Jamie. He had Curly hair.

I was talking to Jamal about my mom.

You don't know who Jamal is, hes a gay guy who hangs around with the mall clique.

I realized WORKING at or near the mall and being 15-23 and some other qualification I havent found yet makes you part of this invisible mall clique.

So I was going to rant about this comment I saw on youtube. About how gay people don't deserve the right to marry because marrying is for starting families and a woman can't start a family with another woman and so those "freaks" don't deserve to get married.


Yeah.


Then I was distracted by Eylse from top models blog.


Anywho. I lose faith in humans a little bit every day. The world actually kind of sucks a lot.

Jessi and I with Sophies help were writing our zombie/vampire movie.

I love writing things.

Well I think that those "freaks" who think equal rights means equal rights for those who conform to their own beliefs... they just drive me insane.

'smellows are good.

if you can't figure out what 'smellows are then...you lost the game.

I can't stand people in general. Never really could. Even though I'm good at making friends.

I have pasta and chili on my stove.

It's called poor people food. even though I actually could have bought more. I just realized in the store that I didn't want to buy anything else. I just don't care that much any more.

Food is for energy.

And maybe entertainment sometimes...mmm 'smellows.

I keep getting more excited for the 25th. Not because of christmas itself, working in the mall at this time of year, I'm already done with it, but because of the maybeness of getting a digital video camera from my mom.

I want to paint. I've been really inspired just watching this guy on youtube;



I feel really behind that I just watched all of his videos even though I knew of him before now.



Current video watched count:9,182



Make something of me.



perceptions aren't worth believing. Either way.


This is my life right now guys.

isn't it always.

By Barry Manilow and the Today show.

"An apartment is really the wrong word for it, it should be called a Hassle, that way if someone says 'Hey man wanna get a hassle together?' you'll be like 'no.'"

XDXDXDXD

Have I ever mentioned I live in a kind of jewish neighborhood? My grocery store, the one in walking distance, is jewish anyway.

Why can't we just tell each other when we like each other. Why do we have to go through the steps, set out by someone else. Why do I have to play the game, jump through hoops.

IF you like me then like me.

Boys smell.

I have bags under my eyes. An apple. and Chicago is on.


Now the apple is gone.

I'm kind of a lonely person.

Take a few elementary school classes and throw them up in the air and see where they land.

Its so weird to think about how different we are as people and who we've become and who we've yet to become.

I'm totally being smothered by this nostalgia lately. I can't stand it.

<3

P.s. No one came.